As life progresses , im beginning to gain the "ability" to NOT take it too seriously and grimly.
Ive been through IIT-jee ( ok , the rank looked like a telephone number) probably its gotta do smtih with my trip :D. Ive stayed at hostels and been through whatever they do at hostels.Ive been beaten blue (though verbally) by bullies and slapped red by frustrated teachers.Ive been termed a decently intelligent scholar by some people (were they drunk ?)and been labelled a total waste of flesh and blood by many (now this is some sensible stuff ).ive been through crashing my papa's car into a wall.ive cried like a kid watching rajesh khanna die in "anand" and cowered like a old woman watching the "omen".
Im just 21 and have quite some years before i crash into hell (heaven for me ? try telling mr.god).
But even now if i look back at my life ,its just like a story with its share of laughs , tears,triumphs , dissapointments , ridicule , pain and joy.
And as i read all these blogs, i find that mine is just a story amongst millions.I see that even though I tend to look at the world as if i am the central pin of the world with all this stuff happening around me, im not.i am just one of billions of people ,each one living his or her story.
Everybody thinks his/her is "THE" story.but if i step back a little and see at my life from the outside ,like another person would , i find i am just a little peg in this big thing we call the world.and my story would see its last too one day.
So i just want to have a good time.or as jim carrey wud say , a "Gooodd!!" Life.
Life is not an exam to be cracked for me.just live life.just have a good laugh , love and be loved.take it easy.
I don't want my story to look like a research project.I don't want it to have many complications.I dont want it to have too many intense and soul searching moments.Not the story where a villain beats me blue for 90% of my life till at the climax , i rise like a phoenix to be a memorable victor.
I don't need to win the world.I dont want my statues to be erected all over the place with pigeons dropping their digested breakfasts over my stony head.I dont want to be applauded with the world falling at my feet.
I just want my story to look like a little and light romantic comedy.A few tears and more laughs.Hugs and smiles.A little simple sweet story with no villains.Where the president of Microsoft doesnt know me but my neighbour thinks of me as a nice person.I wud just be content to have a house full of laughs,with ppl who think i am tolerable(am i tolerable , silly ? ;) ).
I wud love just to sit with my family on a chirpy sunday afternoon.having a good time teasing and laughing.eating a yummy (and cheap) lunch and a cool vanilla icecream as the dessert( n i wont share it ,got that ?).
A little house with trees around.with music playing and love and trust in the hearts of my loved ones.....oops , 3..2..1..bam ! back to reality now.
Am i unambitious ? Is there some problem in my head ? Some of you would term me a coward.one who doesn't have the passion and the killer instinct.one who is wasting all resources.Have mercy on me , o great victors !
But then guys , i am sorry.I dont say I won't work hard or that I don't have any goals.I have worked HARD for being watever i am and am happy( dont read the prevois post tho :D) to be here and have more plans in store.You can have doubts on my abilities if you want.
But I won't let myself be sucked into any mean and fast rat race , if that's the concept of life for anybody.I want my life to sound like a little , sweet n love -filled symphony.may not be noticed by the world , but sweet nevertheless.Thats cool.
Tuesday, July 11, 2006
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